Vice President Joe Biden to become a Republican

Apparently, President Barack Obama believes in that old adage, “With friends like you, who needs enemies?”

Obama, sources tell Ponderings From Pluto, has quietly told Vice President Joe Biden that if Biden wants to be on Obama’s 2012 re-election ticket, he will have to change his party affiliation from Democrat to Republican.


Would the GOP be glad to have Biden?

The sources, speaking on the condition of anonymity, added that Obama has greatly been perturbed by Biden’s public gaffes, including the latest saying in an interview that the GOP has spent $200 billion on campaigns to help Republicans win upcoming races and re-take the House and Senate.

We suspect he meant to say $200 million and apparently has been watching the Austin Powers movies where Dr. Evil holds the world hostage for a laughably-small ransom and then travels back in time and holds the world hostage for a laughably-large ransom.

In the past, among his many gaffes, Biden has also disclosed a top-secret location of the vice presidential bunker, suggested Americans suspend all airplane travel during the Swine Flu scare, taken credit for the successes the Iraq and Afghanistan surges after insisting in the campaign that both had been complete failures, asked a wheelchair-bound man to stand up, dropped F-bombs loud and clear in live microphones and claimed to have invented wireless internet service.

There have also been rumors that First Lady Michelle Obama refused to talk to Biden for several weeks after he joked to her that she should grow cotton in her White House garden.

“The way I see it, if Joe is going to continue to be ‘Crazy Joe’ and say and do bizarre things, I should minimize my losses and have him become a Republican,” President Obama said at a recent press conference. “This is the only way I would consider asking him to run again with me in 2012.”

Why keep Biden on the ticket if he says so many embarrassing things?

“Because he’s funny,” the president replied. “This job is far tougher than I’d imagined, and everyday I wonder what I got myself into, but Joe often brings me greatly-needed comic relief. And his gaffes take all the focus off my gaffes.”

Biden has said if he converts to the GOP, he will be a “Blue Dog Republican”.

Many conservatives wonder why the media continue giving a free pass to Biden, arguing that the media should apologize for its magnification of former vice president Dan Quayle’s gaffes.

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One Response to Vice President Joe Biden to become a Republican

  1. tangel476 says:

    This Democrat strategy is not so ridiculous. It was revealed in the latest episode of ‘The Event’

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